Opportunities and Challenges

I was honored by my friends' request to "officiate" their commitment ceremony. What I didn't expect was how it would change me. I arrived in town for dinner, and when I got home, I reviewed what I was going to say, and started to get very emotional. I was re-working it a bit, re-typing and reviewing everything, and I needed an objective point of view. It was quite late, but my friend Stephanie answered. She approved of what I had written, and followed with: "you need to somehow incorporate this part of you into your teaching".

Well, I knew right away she was right, but I asked her to elaborate. She said, if I could share this part of me with my students, they would be able to connect with me and feel that I care about them, and she shared with me some feedback she had received from people who had attended my classes. What hurt about these words was she was right. I know I have not totally shared myself with my students. The worst part was thinking that my students had suffered for it, and did not know how much I care about them.

I don't know what this is all going to mean for me, my teaching and my students, but I do know that sharing what's in my heart (without sounding like a blowhard) will be a challenge. I'm guarded. The power of what I feel inside is overwhelming, and I don't yet know how to express it without being overly-emotional. This process is going to make me a better human being and a better yoga teacher. And that's what it's all about anyway.

I salute, honor and support my friends Gary and Chris as they embark on their life together. And I thank them for being the kind of friends that inspire and challenge me to be the best human being I can be.
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Here's what I said during the opening remarks while "officiating" the commitment ceremony:

Hi Everyone, I’m Liz. I met Gary a few years ago when he attended a yoga class I was teaching. As yoga practitioners, we’re trying to peel away the layers of junk that prevent us from radiating our true selves, which is, of course, Love. When thinking about Love, I turned to the writings of a Sufi Mystic and Poet of the 13th century named Rumi, and I came across these words, so apropos for this ceremony:

“On a day when the wind is perfect, the sail just needs to open, and the world is full of beauty. Today is such a day.”

The fact is, the wind of life, and life’s available experience, is ALWAYS perfect. It’s really just a matter of opening the sails of the heart, so that the hardened layers of protection we wear as a result of the less enjoyable aspects of Life can be shed, and Beauty can be seen in its full glory. Today IS such a day. Today is a gateway. You may have noticed that marriages are often conducted under archways. These gates or archways are symbols; of goals attained, and more importantly, as a symbol of the end of one phase, and the beginning of another.

Gary and Chris, you’ve chosen to stand here together and make some serious promises to each other, and then walk together through the metaphorical gate to the rest of your Life together. It takes courage and “heart” to make these commitments, and to have this opportunity is a Blessing. No lifetime voyage is without hardships, but know that you are not alone. We are all here, literally at your back, to support you. Today is about your love for and commitment to each other—but know that you are not the only ones making promises today. Our presence here signifies our commitment to you as a couple, helping you all along the way, doing our part to help you keep your promise to each other.

With that said, it’s the two of you that will do the heavy lifting, and reap the incomparable rewards that only come with hard work, devotion, sacrifice, and most of all Love. Where do we look for Love, and how do we keep it alive?

I don’t know what words of inspiration I can offer to the two of you, who inspire all of us. It’s your love for each other that brought you together, and brings us all here. What is love?

Gary, Love is the feeling in your heart that fills it completely, in way you never imagined you could feel for another human being…

Chris, Love is the music of Gary’s laughter in your ears…

Gary and Chris, Love is the respect you have for each other’s way of expressing themself and the confidence each of you have in being who you are…

Chris, Love is Gary’s unexpected kindness towards and tolerance of Teddy when you first met (letting you know you would get the same treatment)…

Gary, Love is talking about your future with Chris early on, even though it made you little nervous, and Love is also his reaction.

Love isn’t one big thing, Love is the Beauty in all the little things. You already recognize the Beauty in each other, and in all the little things about your Beloved. It’s these little signs of Beauty, that add up to the one big thing: the two of you together.

Before the lovely Julie reads for you, I will leave you with one last bit of advice from one of Rumi’s poems on keeping love alive:

RELATIONSHIP BOOSTER
Here is a relationship booster
that is guaranteed to
work:

Every time your spouse or lover says something stupid
make your eyes light up as if you

just heard something

brilliant.